Safeguarding against sexual abuse

In fall 2025, a close-knit Southern community erupted with shock and anger when a 26-year-old female youth leader and former coach pled guilty to state charges of sexual battery of a minor by someone in a position of trust and authority. She was sentenced to house arrest and supervised release for engaging in sexual acts with a teenage girl in the church youth group that she led. It was also revealed that there had been an extensive grooming process in which the leader gained the trust of the victim and the victim’s mother.

Days later, the young woman faced federal charges of transporting a minor over state lines for sexual purposes – a charge arising from youth camp trips made under her supervision, which included sexual activity with the victim. As of press time, she was awaiting federal trial.

While the local community was stunned because of her leadership in the church and her good reputation, the particulars of the case – a trusted relationship, an environment deemed safe, and an intentional grooming process – are often present in instances of sexual abuse. This is where the work of an organization called MinistrySafe (ministrysafe.com) comes into play.

Recognizing patterns of abuse

MinistrySafe highlights common factors in child sex abuse cases and provides preventive training for churches, ministries, and other child-serving organizations. Founded by husband-wife legal team Gregory Love and Kimberlee Norris, MinistrySafe draws on their combined 60 years of experience litigating child sex abuse cases.

“As we litigated [child sex abuse] cases all over the country, we began to see patterns in the way individuals selected kids, gained access to them, groomed them for inappropriate sexual interaction, and then kept those kids silent after the fact,” Norris told The Stand. “So, we felt it was important to take those predictable patterns and create [prevention] resources accessible in Christ-based contexts.”

MinistrySafe’s training programs include videos, webinars, and in-person instruction, but the organization’s core training is on sexual abuse awareness, which draws on statistics and insights compiled from actual offender studies.

“[Sexual Abuse Awareness Training] addresses facts about sexual abuse and sexual abusers: the basic characteristics of a sexual abuser, the grooming process of the offender, and key indicators of child sexual abuse,” Norris said. “I think the part that tends to have the most impact is twofold. [First is] the common misconceptions, because most people have misconceptions about sexual abuse and sexual abusers.”

The most common misconception, Norris stated, is that the biggest risk of sexual abuse is from “stranger danger” – someone outside trusted circles of family, friends, school, sports, or church. The reality is that “93% of victims under 18 know their abuser,” according to RAINN (rainn.org), the nation’s largest anti-sexual violence nonprofit.

MinistrySafe’s Sexual Abuse Awareness Training provides these notable facts that correct other misconceptions:
• [Sexual abuse] does not have to involve touch. It can be verbal or visual.
• One in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys have been sexually abused by age 18.
• [Not] all abusers are men. In the convicted population, 90% are male and 10% are female.
• One out of three reported cases of child sexual abuse are peer-to-peer issues: children victimizing other children.

Identifying the grooming process

Norris believes the second biggest impact of Sexual Abuse Awareness Training is learning the grooming process of the abuser.

“Because [the grooming process] is visible, or at least elements of it are visible … it’s also preventable,” she said.

The grooming process begins when a preferential offender, who favors children of a certain age or sex, gains access to such children, perhaps in a church group. The offender then selects a child and begins working to gain trust and time alone with the child. This also involves grooming the “gatekeepers” – anyone in a position of authority over the child: parents, teachers, etc.

As Norris points out, there are notable characteristics of grooming behaviors – ones that can be strategically blocked by organizational policies and appropriate oversight.

Norris described key grooming behaviors along with policies and observations that can prevent them.

1. Gift-giving

“Molesters tend to be good at figuring out what kids want or need … then giving it to them,” she said. “What this means is there should not be one-to-one giving allowed.”

2. Kid-magnet activities

“Molesters gather around themselves things that children within their age and gender preference would like to do,” Norris said. “That’s another way to spot somebody who might have the wrong motive.”

3. Repeated time alone with a child

“Molesters set up repeated time alone with the same child,” Norris explained. “This is the basis for the two-adult rule in [supervising] child-serving programs.”

4. Pushing physical boundaries

“Molesters tend to be touchy with children,” Norris said. “They push physical boundaries concerning what is acceptable to that child in terms of physical touch. This is something you can put policies around, setting up what I call bright-line policies very clearly defining ‘This is OK. This is not.’”

5. Breaking rules and justifying rule-breaking “Molesters are adept at stepping over instruction from a parent or ministry and then explaining why it’s OK they broke the rules,” Norris said.

6. Playful but inappropriate touch

“This is touching a child in a place that wouldn’t be OK if the adult just walked up and touched the child there, especially in front of a parent, but it becomes OK because it’s happening in a playful context,” Norris said. “Think tickling, wrestling, towel pops, and so on. Those types of behaviors also need to be something around which policy is put in place.”

While awareness of the risks for sexual abuse can be overwhelming, Norris encourages using the information provided by MinistrySafe to take a proactive approach.

“Ministries need to be aware because these common behaviors are what is visible, and you can put policies around these types of behaviors,” she said. “It’s a matter of being forewarned about this issue. That doesn’t mean live in fear. That means arm yourself with good information, which is why we created MinistrySafe.”