Learning to Sink or Swim

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Maternal instinct.

This is a concept that I have heard tossed about the majority of my life. An article from The Bump explains that, “The idea of maternal instinct seems to lie at the intersection of love and intuition. It’s the belief that mothers share an immediate bond with their babies and inherently know how to care for them.”

However, there is some debate over whether this is a scientific fact or a myth.

The article continued by saying that “fathers who log more one-on-one time caring for their child show stronger connections between areas of the brain used for detecting cues and social cognition—a pattern similar to mothers who are primary caregivers.”

Overall, the conclusion is that caring for children reveals an instinct to protect them, even above our own interests.

This summer, my husband and I took our toddler for a swim in the pool. And to be honest, he was not at all amused by the giant “tub,” as he called it. While we were there, I heard the story from another mom about the first time she brought her son swimming; the only thing he was interested in was wearing his floaties and staring down the ladder hanging in the deep end of the pool.

Naturally, this little boy decided at one point that he needed to crawl into the deep end and inch himself down the ladder into the deepest part of the water. His dad stood on the concrete, and his mom stood on the edge of the “deep-end” liner, ready to hold her baby when he made it off of the step.

Sure enough, he climbed down the ladder and landed straight in his mom’s arms. But as she held him, she slipped from the ledge and began to sink.

She told me that before she realized it, her eyes were open underwater, and she had completely forgotten how to hold her breath. The only thing she focused on was holding the little boy up as high as possible so his dad could grab him – which he did.

After she made it back to the surface, she asked her husband whether their child had gone underwater. He laughed and told her, “You went under, but he stayed at the exact same position because of how you held him.”

When in reality, for a brief moment, she shared that it was the closest she thought she’d ever come to drowning. But regardless, the only thing that mattered was that her baby was safe.

Thankfully, this story ended with everyone above water, but it showed me how, myth or not, caring for our young ones can lead us to put their needs and safety above everything else.

It also made me think of another important father who was ready and willing to care, and even die, for his children – even those who let their fears run rampant.

In Matthew 14:22-31, we read the story of Peter walking on the water with Jesus. It says:

[A]nd the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it. Shortly before dawn Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear. But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.” “Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus.

Once the disciples realized it was Jesus in the middle of the storm, I imagine they let out a little sigh of relief. Peter instantly knew that his friend Jesus would take care of him if he ventured out of the boat.

But as the story continues, we read that Peter began to take his gaze off of the Lord, and when he did, he started to sink.

But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”

Just like my friend’s husband hovering over her and her child, Peter knew Jesus was right there. Yet, in an instant, he let his fears overtake him, and he sank.

Actually, he doubted.

Peter doubted that the strong hand that had allowed him to walk on water wasn’t capable enough to keep him afloat.

Isn’t that how our lives always seem to go, though?

Often, we seem to swim through life until a moment comes when everything changes, and our fears about that situation take the spotlight off our Savior. He’s still there, waiting for us to trust Him, but the choice to do so is ours.

If we choose to grab hold of His hand and focus on His goodness, He will walk with us through whatever waters rise.

We have to trust Him.

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