Earlier this summer, Netflix’s infamous period drama Bridgerton released its third season. Characteristically, the season contained enough explicit sexual content to make Jane Austen roll in her grave, and characteristically, it was a hit.
Created by TV producer Shonda Rhimes, Bridgerton gives viewers an up-close and, shall we say, intimate view into the lives and romance of Regency London. The debut of Season 3 garnered a whopping 45.1 million views, earning it the title of Netflix’s most-watched show in 78 countries.
Numerous brand partnerships were formed in anticipation of the new season, ranging from hand soap to coffee creamer and dinnerware. Although it could be argued the show’s fame comes from its storyline or extravagantly elegant aesthetic, countless fans have used social media to reveal their obsessions with and reactions to the show’s steamiest scenes – scenes that Season 3 most certainly did not shy away from.
At the London premiere for the second installation of the third season, which aired June 13, several of Bridgerton's leading ladies and gentlemen shared their relationship advice. And although Bridgerton should most certainly not be the ultimate authority on what perfect love looks like, examining the cast’s advice through the lens of God’s design does reveal some wisdom.
I’m not a self-proclaimed expert on relationships. Any relationship in my life is centered on my relationship with Christ, who loved me enough to give His life for me. That kind of radical love demands I love others. It also demands that I want something more than the false love the world tries to sell me.
I am a member of Generation Z, the generation that shows such as Bridgerton target with cheap portrayals of romance and the generation that is so often pressured to place our identity in our relationship status.
So, whether you’re a fellow member of Gen Z, or you’ve been married for over fifty years, or you’re a parent trying to help your child navigate the world of dating, remember what and who true love is – a heavenly Father who never, ever changes.
Bridgerton: “Love wins every time.” (Golda Rosheuvel)
The Bible: We have come to know and have believed the love which God has for us. God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him ... There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love (1 John 4:16,18).
The only reason we, in our human nature, can love one another is because we have a perfect God who loved us first. His love casts out all fear, and the reason why love wins every time is because our God is love. If He is for us, who can be against us?
Bridgerton: “Don’t compromise yourself. Wait for the right person because you’re worth it.” (Nicola Coughlan)
The Bible: I want you to swear, O daughters of Jerusalem, do not arouse or awaken my love until she pleases (Song of Solomon 8:4).
Although dating culture consumes the lives of teenagers and young adults in today’s world, the average age at which individuals get married continues to increase, which indicates something is not working. Unhealthy relationships are often created by fears of rejection or isolation, but we must remember there is a time for everything (Ecclesiastes 3:1). He who began a good work in us will carry it to completion (Philippians 1:6).
Bridgerton: “Be true to yourself.” (Ruth Gemmell)
The Bible: The heart is more deceitful than all else and is desperately sick; who can understand it? (Jeremiah 17:9)
Being true to ourselves is a roadmap for failure. Our flesh and sinful nature will always place ourselves first, creating a whirlwind of self-destruction. While we may not always know what is best for us, we were designed by a Creator who works all things for His glory and our good. Following His best, even if we aren’t sure where it may lead, will always be the better option.
Bridgerton: “[The men on Bridgerton are] supportive and loving and all know how to dress and dance.” (Shonda Rhimes)
The Bible: But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7).
Modern culture tells us we need someone who looks and dresses a certain way (or, in Rhimes’ case, someone who can dance). While there is nothing inherently wrong with searching for particular qualities in a potential spouse, we must remember the heart of marriage: It models Christ’s relationship with the church. Who is someone you can go to spiritual war with? Who will sharpen you like iron and encourage you to spiritually flourish? Finding that person will make for a far stronger marriage than finding someone who merely knows how to ballroom dance.
Bridgerton: “Romanticism has probably messed us up a bit. … So romance, whilst it’s beautiful, don’t rely on it for the rest of your life.” (Claudia Jessie)
The Bible: And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect (Romans 12:2).
Jessie’s advice is perhaps some of the most grounded from the cast. Modern television and film typically showcase the beginning of a relationship – the carefree, blissful days of romance that audiences attempt to find an escape in. Real life is hard, and real life is full of reminders this world is not our home. A truly strong relationship is rooted in Christ and fixes its eyes on the eternal hope we cling to.
Bridgerton: “Know what you want, know why you want it … and this is a tricky one for a lot of people, but I truly believe in this – you got to make sure you’re fishing in the right pond.” (Daniel Francis)
The Bible: How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, nor stand in the path of sinners, nor sit in the seat of scoffers! But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and in His law he meditates day and night (Psalm 1:1-2).
The world constantly lies to us about what true love is. The least helpful thing we can do is lie to ourselves, trying to idealize someone we know isn’t best for us. Seek Christian counsel when pursuing a relationship. Create a list of the negotiable and non-negotiable qualities you seek in a future spouse. And most of all, delight in the Lord. He is, and will forever be, our ultimate source of love.
