Questioning the Questions

A few days back, I encountered a social media conversation in which a local minister and business owner proposed a question as to whether viewing pornography was any different than reading an explicit romance novel. It was a great question, and the ensuing online discourse was quite lively. People (most of whom I recognize in passing or know very well) had varying opinions.

Truthfully, pornography is a huge, growing problem, even for Christians.

According to Beyond the Porn Phenomenon, a research study published in 2024 by the Barna Group in conjunction with Pure Desire Ministries, 61% of American adults admit to viewing pornography. The study also found that “just over half of practicing Christians report consuming porn with some level of frequency," whether the frequency of their admitted usage was on a weekly basis (15%) or daily (7%).

Considering those stats, the most intriguing aspect of this social media conversation about pornography and dirty novels was just how civil it remained.

Statistically speaking, 61% of those discussing the online question view pornography, but the conversation never got heated or crazy. Each participant was respectful of others in the exchange, even though I knew that some of the people in the online talk professed to be Christians, some openly opposed those beliefs, and some really didn’t care either way.

As such, there was never an admitted (or required) census over the proposed question. Instead, every single person taking part, either by sharing or simply reading and watching (like me), left the conversation thinking about both the query and the answers given (again, like me).

In fact, I pondered the conversation all day long, and even though I admittedly agree with the proposed comparison of watching porn and reading smut, I was more agreeable to the tone of the exchange itself.

It was nothing at all like the multiple online conversations about the release of Taylor Swift's latest album, “The Life of a Showgirl.” In every one of those exchanges, the battle raged as to whether her work is pure genius or pure trash, with the lines of demarcation exceptionally clear.

Granted, I view the lyrics of her music as highly detrimental (and yes, trashy) for the young women who attend her shows and purchase her work. But I usually just shake my head and silently wonder how anyone who claims to be a Christian can defend the songs that Taylor Swift sings.

Yep. I swiftly conclude conversations with other believers about Taylor Swift, asking only one question my pastor taught me: “Would you feel comfortable listening to this album aloud with Jesus sitting beside you?”

That question may sound a bit extreme or even ridiculous, but it really is a good question for Christians to ask ourselves before we consume any media, be it music, movies, books, or even online posts.

But asking a question of ourselves or fellow Christians is not the same as conversing with contradictory beliefs.

Even so, in his book, Ten Questions from the King, author Mark Cahill challenges Christians to model our Savior in crafting and using relevant questions to challenge nonbelievers to truly think about Jesus.

According to Cahill, the Bible records 135 questions that Jesus asked those around Him. Some were directed to His followers, but some were intended for those who opposed Him or had not made a choice either way. In other words, His audience was much like the one I encountered on my minister friend’s Facebook page.

Cahill explains that questions make us think, and they make us ponder. So, he also practices what he preaches by asking this question: “So where would we find the best questions ever asked?”

Obviously, the answer to his question was Jesus: “By taking a closer look at some of the Master’s most fascinating questions, we might learn how to ask good questions as well.”

Not only are our Savior’s 135 biblical questions the best questions ever, but those asked by His precious Holy Spirit get straight to the point, too.

And that point brings me right back to a recent conversation I had with friends about the new Taylor Swift album, in which I asked, “Would you be able to listen to this music with Jesus sitting beside you?”

Now, keep in mind that I really do envision Jesus sitting beside me as I read, watch a movie, or choose music on my car radio, and that single question has slowly and surely changed my choices of entertainment.

But I love how quick and powerful God is to get right to the heart of my own sins.

He has let me know on various occasions that He sees and blesses my refusal to consume ungodly books or movies, but without hesitation, as I drove home in the silence of my car that same night of our Taylor Swift discussion, His precious Holy Spirit asked me a question that hit me like a ton of bricks: “Joy, would you feel comfortable with Jesus sitting beside you and listening to all of your conversations?”

Wham! There it was.

Yes, my eyes, ears, hands, and mind have been disciplined to include Jesus in their entertainment pursuits ... but my mouth fails on many occasions. And the Bible tells us that out of the abundance or overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks.

Or as Reverend Douglas R. Chapman puts it, “You don’t have to lift a roof atop a house to know what went on inside. Simply watch what emerges from that house.”

No, I do not swear or talk about explicit topics. But I do find myself speaking negatively and without gratitude. My opinion emerges from my mouth too quickly on too many topics (including the actions of others), without considering His biblical opinion on the subject.

But with one Spirit-filled question, I instantly realized that I still have a lot to learn about controlling my mouth and fashioning my words to sound more like the life-giving words of my Savior.

So, the next time I share my question, I will adjust it to ask, “Would I be comfortable with Jesus sitting beside me, no matter what I watch, read, listen to, or say?”

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